Passionate Baby
by EvanSpice
Summary: This is My First Fanfic, The Begining is a bit slow but trust me it gets better.
1. Chapter 1

**Fox and Kay are at Tabithas in Kays Bedroom, Kay is drunk**  
Fox: Goodnight Kay.  
Kay: Foooox I am not tired  
_Kay tries her best to sing a moment like this_  
Kay: Fox can you go put on your Qupid outfit on plzz  
_Fox walks in with his Qupid outfit with p0rno music as background Music (Bow Chicka Bow Bow)_  
Kay: Oh Fox take me  
_Camera Spys on Fox and Kay in the closet, You can hear breathing_

**Now its at Chad and his Mystery Persons motel room**  
Chad: Buttercup I love you so much  
Mystery Person: I Love you too Sunshine Beefcake  
Chad: I hope you understand that I love Whitney and I plan to marry her  
Mystery Person: Oh I understand as long as we love each other  
Chad: No Offence but I dont even think we can get married  
_Myster Person imagines "Well I have my plans for that Biznatch Whitney, she'll never suspect a thing"_

**On The street where Jessica is "Escorting"**  
Jessica: I Don't want to do this, lets go home Spike.  
Spike: Baby We won't even have a home unless you make our money, Here lick this sticker  
_Jessica licks one of those happy face stickers_  
Spike: There a car is pulling up, Why don't you go talk to him.  
_Jessica Walks up to the car and knocks on the car Window_  
Jessica: Hey hot stuff you looking for a good time  
_Person in car rolls down the window_  
Driver: Oh Yes  
Jessica: Oh my God its you 


	2. Chapter 2

**Fox and Kay in Kays bedroom, Kay still drunk**  
Kay: Oh Fox Take me, Make love to me plz  
Fox: I didn't agree to having sex with you  
Kay: But fooooxxxx You know us having sex is the only way I can feel good about my self  
Fox: What?  
Kay: Nothing  
Fox: Ok whatever Kay this skirt is really uncomftorable, I feel a brease (The Cupid outfit)  
Kay: Do you want me to turn the fan off?  
Fox: No  
_Fox puts the fan on the floor_  
_Fox goes under the fan and poses as if he was Marilyn Monroe_  
Fox: Reminds me of when Evan use to pay me to dress up as a woman  
Kay: What ever happened to Evan?  
_A loud noise comes from the closet_  
Fox: Did you hear that?  
_Kay thinking it was Miguel (Shes drunk)_  
Kay: Umm No I didn't  
Fox: Whatever I watch Days you know I know when to look and when not to look in a closet  
_Fox opens the closet door_  
Kay: Noooooooo!

**Chad is at his Motel room with his Mystery lover**  
Chad: So Buttercup you're not mad at me for wanting to marry Whitney are you?  
Mystrery Person: No, Not at all Beefcake. I knew our relationship wouldnt last. Considering you don't want to be seen with me.  
Chad: Buttercup don't say that, You know how judgemental people can be.  
Mystery Person: Are you sure you're just not ashamed of me?  
Chad: No I'm not buttercup I would tell the whole world How much I love you if I wasent with Whitney  
Mystery: Awweee Chad I love you  
_Chad and Mystery Person Kiss_  
Chad: I love you too, Connie.

**Jessica has just stopped a car on the streets**  
_The Driver rolls down the window_  
Jessica: Oh my God, its you... Miguel?  
Miguel: Jessica? I thought you worked at the North side  
Jessica: What the fk, You know where we all work??  
Miguel: Hehe Oops  
Jessica: Why are you buying whores? Wont Siren give it for free?  
Miguel: Siren left Jessica, without warning. She probly found a house with 3 guys or something.  
Jessica: true dat  
_Awkward Pause_  
Miguel: So Jessica are you going to live up to your commitments or what?  
Jessica: Oh sure  
_Miguel parks the car So him and Jessica can do things_  
Jessica: Umm I don't think we should do this here  
Miguel: Don't worry I'll be done in two minutes  
_Jessica gives Miguel a condom_  
Miguel: Its alright, I brought a chocolate one  
Jessica: Oh Wow millionare are we  
_Car zooms out of the car, Jessica and Miguel start to make love_  
_Sam is driving home from work and notices The car_  
_Sam drives up to Miguels parked car "Those careless s.o.b's"_  
_Sam knocks on the window_  
Sam: You people having fun  
Jessica: Oh My god  
Miguel: Do you always end with that line?

**On The next Passionate Baby**  
Foxs finds something Mysterious in the closet  
Connie reveals her plans to take Whitney down  
Does Sam find Jessica and Miguel?  
Murder is commited at the Mansion (And No its not Phyllis)


	3. Chapter 3

**Fox and Kay are in Kays bedroon where Fox is about to Check whos in the closet**  
_Fox grabs the door knob and turns it a little_  
Kay: No Fox wait.  
Fox: Why? I'll take 2 seconds.  
Kay: Fooox I'm drunk remember, feel free to take advantage  
Fox: Kay who are you kidding we both Know you can be in the mood at a funeral..  
_Kay Gives Fox a evil look_  
Kay: That was one time, and in My defense the church reminds me of Mel Gipson.  
Fox: Yeah Whatever Kay I'm going to check the closet  
_Fox Opens the closet door_  
Fox: Oh My Gosh  
Kay: What?  
Kay: And did you just say gosh?  
Fox: What in the world is this  
_Kay Thinks to herself: "Please dont let it be the wetback, Please dont let it be the wetback"_  
Fox: Kay.. What is a empty bucket of chicken doing in our closet  
_Kay thinks of an excuse, remember she thinks it was Miguel_  
Kay: Oh umm I admit it.. I put Endora and Maria in there when its My turn to baby sit..  
Fox: Um.. oh that still dosen't explain the noise  
Kay: Oh Um Well Maria is still in there  
Fox: What?  
Kay: Yeah.. Just let her stay in there, It's my feitsh.

**Chad and Cracked Connie are in the motel room**  
Chad: Buttercup I have to go now. Whitney is probably wondering where I am.  
Connie: Awe, You're going already?  
Chad: I'm sorry But I have to it's for our own good.  
Connie: Well See you Sunshine beefcake.  
_Chad gets ready and leaves_  
_Connie Picks up a picture of Whitney Chad has left behind_  
Connie: Oh Whitney Whitney Whitney You have no Idea what's coming to you, And the best part is you won't suspect a thing until it Happens.  
_Connie Imagines_  
Connie: The next full moon on October 31st. A little friend of Mine will come alive and attack You Whitney. Oh How I love you Mini Whiney.. After you're gone Chad will be all mine. _  
i(Mini Whitney is the hedious doll that Chad gave to Whitney, Connie made it to give it to Chad as an excuse for him)_

**Jessica and Miguel are having sex in a car Where Sam is ready to arrest**  
_Jessica is faking, she notices a police car stops Because they were spoted_  
Jessica: Oh my god Oh my God Oh My God It's My dad, What do we do?  
Miguel: What?  
Jessica: My Dad is walking up to the car Like right now.  
Miguel: Oh God don't tell him I'm paying you minimum wage.  
Jessica: Oh My God Hide me  
_Miguel grabs his coat_  
Miguel: Here you hide under here.  
Jessica: Ew I'm not hiding under that thing  
Miguel: Oh Come on Its not the worst thing you've ever done  
Jessica: Yeah But I don't want wetback germs  
Miguel: Oh puhleeze

_Sam is walking up to the car_  
Sam: What the hell are they doing in there?  
_Sam gets close to the car and knocks on the window_  
Sam: Don't act like no ones in there I seen your shadows  
_Sam's Police Radio Goes off: "There's been a murder at the Crane mansion All Units Please report to the Crane Mansion."_  
Sam: Oh God...  
_Sam Gets back into the car and drives to the Crane mansion_

Jessica: He's leaving..  
Miguel: Is he? Oh Thank God  
_Jessica sniffs_  
Jessica: Do you smell KFC?  
Jessica: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!  
_Jessica spots someone spying on them_  
Miguel: What's the matter?  
Jessica: Someone was just spying on us  
Miguel: What? where did he go?  
Jessica: He ran over there  
_Jessica points in the woods_  
_Miguel Puts on his clothes and chases after the Peeping Tom_

**On The Next Passionate Baby**  
An Important Character was murdered at the Crane Mansion  
The Harmony Peeping Tom is Revealed  
Sheridan slaps Fancy


	4. Chapter 4

**The Crane Mansion, One Hour Earlier**  
_JT Meets up with Gwen in the Hallway_  
JT: Hello Gwennie  
Gwen: JT What the F are you doing here beyotch, What if Eth.Dawg sees you, And By the way foo, Its G.Money not Gwennie  
JT: Well I decided to give Theresa the proof about the tabloid story in about 45 Mins.  
Gwen: Shorty What? 45 Mins? Thats almost half and hour  
JT: Percicly,and I need the mullah mullah I'm in trouble with the IRS remember  
Gwen: Homie das nasty foo, I can give you my mullah mullah if you tell me Tacos seceret, yo.  
JT: No You can't, I'm gonna go talk to Terrorsita right now, See you.  
Gwen: You so nasty, you a nasty motha fka  
JT: Shes more like a grandmother.  
Gwen: Btch please  
_JT Goes to look for Theresa_  
_Gwen Picks up a bottle of Poision_  
Gwen: Imma Have to Kill you JT

_JT Walks into Theresas Office, Where she is eating Tacos with Salsa_  
JT: Oh Tacosita  
Theresa: What the hel are you doing here JT?  
JT: Oh I just wanted to give you the truth about the tabloid story  
Theresa: What Why?  
JT: Well First you have to pay me  
Theresa: What how much?  
JT: Five Hundered Million Dollars  
Theresa: WTF I'm not paying you Half a billion dollars just for Ethans cheating as  
JT: Well then If you dont give me 500 Mil, then I'll tell Gwen and Rebecca who Little Ehtans real father is.  
Theresa: So your blackmailing me? Fine but you have to give me the Proof about Ethan too  
JT: That'll be another 500 Mil Please.  
Theresa: What?!? I can't give you 1 Billion dollars btch  
JT: Well maybe you need to sleep on it, I will come back tommorow and If you dont have your mind made up by then I will tell Gwen And Rebbecca the Truth about Little Ethan, I want you to think about it.  
_Jt leaves the room_  
_Theresa pulls a gun out from her drawer_  
Theresa: The only way I can protect my self and The people I love is by killing you JT.

**In The Crane Living room, Present Time**  
_Sheridan comes running in the room_  
Sheridan: I Got here as soon as I can what happened?  
_Sheridan notices a body covered in a White sheet is getting taken out_  
Sheridan: Jumping mercy who is that  
Fancy: It's JT Cornell, Hes been murdered.  
Sheridan: Oh well at least he isnt an important character.  
Fancy: I know, can you imagine if it was me  
Sheridan: Yea I dont see you dying, I mean like Paris never died  
Fancy: Uhh whats that suppose to mean?  
Sheridan: We all know your a Paris Hilton wannabe  
Fancy: What the F?  
Sheridan: Dont play dumb, I mean the sex tape, your dog Pricella. Nicole.. I mean Esme  
Fancy: Oh thats alot coming from Princess Diana  
_Sheridan btch slaps Fancy_  
_Luis walk into the room_  
_Luis Imagines:_ Awwe they're fighting for my love  
Luis: Girls Theres plenty of Luis to go around

**In The Car Where Jessica is selling her body to Miguel**  
Miguel: So your saying the Peeping Tom ran in the woods?  
Jessica: Yes I am, Go chase him.  
_Miguel Gets out of the Car and Chases the Peeping Tom_  
_Miguel Screams:_ Who the hel are you and why were you spying on us?  
Miguel: Oh God theres no use he had too much of a head start  
_Miguel Looks on the ground_  
Miguel: What the heck is this?  
_Miguel picks up a peice of KFC Chicken_  
Miguel: Oh My God theres a trail.  
_Miguel runs and follows the trail_  
_Peeping Tom is out of breath half dead from running so fast_  
_Miguel catches up to him_  
Miguel: You're tried out already? Its been half a block...  
Peeping Tom: Don't hurt me, for the love of God don't hurt me  
Miguel: Who are you?  
Peeping Tom: My Names Reilly.. James E. Reilly

**On The Next Passionate Baby**  
What is JER up to?  
Find out how JT Died and who murdered him.  
A Face from the past is back and its love at first sight.


	5. Chapter 5

**The Crane Living Room, Fancys Birthday Party**  
Gwen: Yo Fanny Cakes I Wrote you this song, I am mad Cuz the Astablishment took away my bong When I did nothing wrong I Dedictae this song to yous cuz you my pearl I Wanna wish you happy b's to da birthday girl  
Fancy: Awe Gwen.. I'm blushing.  
Gwen: Tis what I wanna see dawg.  
_Esme walks in _  
Esme: I'm Back  
_Fox and Esme look stare at each other, Italian Opera muisc is in the background_  
Esme: Who is this Hunka Hunka burnin' love  
Fox: My name is Fox.. I'm a Crane  
Esme: Ooh.. Giggles Icing on the cake  
Fancy: Ok Will you guys stop please, Today is about me.  
Gwen: Yo Dogs I have something to tell yall..  
Esme, Fox & Fancy: What?  
Gwen: I'm making a rap Album, Hits stores November 15th Yall  
_Fancy throws her keys_  
Fancy: What did I just say?

**Now its Over to Tabithas where Miguel and Tabitha are**  
_Miguel smells KFC_  
Miguel: Oh God.. Its Him again  
_Miguel follows the smell and ends up finding JER where he's outside spying on Tabitha_  
Miguel: JER I thought I told you to stop spying on people  
JER: Giggles That's not all you said last night  
Miguel: Shut up.. Well anyway Your eventually gonna get caught  
JER: I don't care I do what I do when I do it, s'all good  
Miguel: Ok whatever, Why are you spying on people anyway  
JER: Its a fetish of mine I had sence I was 12, I use to be thin you know.. Until I started watching Soaps.. Eating KFC during the love scenes..  
Miguel: Ok Umm.. So whats the E stand for in JER?  
JER: Elizabeth  
Miguel: ...  
JER: Well anyway Tabitha got out of her bath, I'm going some where else bye  
Miguel: Um Whatever I'm going over Jessicas

**Sam is talking with the Forensic Pathologist who was examineing JT's body**  
Sam: So Did you find out how JT was murdered?  
Alynne: Yes.. Well Obviously he was shot But we took a closer look and we found out that he was actually poisoned 20 minutes before he was..  
Sam: So your saying the person who murdered him shot and poisoned him?  
Alynne: Yes Thats what we think  
Sam: Why would they shoot him after they knew he was going to die?  
Alynne: Umm Because lifes a btch?

**Next Time on Passionate Baby**  
Kay walks in on Fox and Esme making out  
Miguel and Jessica get an unexpected offer  
Theresa's DNA was found on the bullet that Killed JT just as Gwen confesses


	6. Chapter 6

**Fancy's Birthday Party at the Crane Mansion**  
Fancy: Ok guys Its time to sing me happy Birthday  
_Fancy looks behind here the band is_  
Fancy: And a 1 and a 2 and a 1 2 3  
_Happy Birthday Insturmental plays in the background_  
Fox & Esme: Happy birthday to you  
Gwen: (Oh Happy happy)  
Fox & Esme: Happy birthday to you  
Gwen: (Oh Happy happy)  
Fox & Esme: Happy Birthday Dear Fancy  
Gwen: (Oh Yes)  
Fancy: Happy birthday to me  
Gwen: Cuz you Da B'day gurl  
_Fancy gets ready to blow the candels on her cake_  
Esme: Oh I can't wait to see Fancys face when She gets her Surprise  
_Noah jumps out of Fancys cake_  
_Fancys eyes roll to the top of her head and she faints_  
Esme: Oh Priceless  
Noah: WTF? No one told me I was gonna jump out of Fancys cake  
Esme: Well of course not.. It would've ruined that surprise  
Gwen: Btch Yo Nasty.. Fancy and Noah are broken up foo  
_Fancy wakes Up_  
Fox: Don't be so hard on Esme it's not like she knows any better  
Esme: Awe how Romantic  
_Esme rape kisses Fox_  
_Kay walks in the room hungover_  
Kay: WTF?!?!?!?!?  
Gwen: Homie dis sht is nasty  
_Gwen leaves the room_

**At The Bennet House**  
_Miguel walks into the Bennett house where he sees Jessica watching Tyra_  
Miguel: Hi Jessica  
Jessica: Hello Miguel.. Are you here for another quickie?  
Miguel: No.. I just came to say that I felt something last night...  
Jessica: Ummm You don't know what that is?  
Miguel: I don't mean that.. I meant I have feelings for you  
Jessica: Oh giggles But I'm seeing Spike remember  
Miguel: Screw him.. We all know Spike is gay with Chris  
Jessica: .. I Guess theres no dening it.. and Hey Do you smell KFC?  
_JER Walks in the Bennett living room_  
JER: Hi Everybody  
Jessica: Santa..?  
Miguel: Thats James Elizabeth Reilly Jessica.. He was the guy spying on us last night  
Jessica: .. AHH! How the F does he know where I Live!?!  
JER: Oh Jessica quit playing hard to get  
Jessica: Excuse me but $15 isnt really that hard to get  
_JER laughs Then takes a bite of his KFC Chicken_  
Jessica: Well anyway JER Don't worry about the whole spying on me thing.. I dont really like to get even, I get odd  
JER: Well it's no wonder that you're a whre  
Miguel: Yeah.. I always thought she was a whre because her Mom nicknamed her Smoochie  
JER: Well really its a Chicken or the egg moment isnt it  
Jessica: Um actually you already have to be a whre to use the prase "Don't get even, get odd"  
Miguel: What are you saying?  
Jessica: I'm saying theres a 99.9 chance become a whore by being nicknamed Smoochie, but saying the "even odd" Phrase confirms it  
Miguel: Oh well that makes sence  
JER: Well anyways.. I wanted to ask you guys something  
Miguel: What is it thudner thighs?  
JER: Do you guys wanna start a 3sum with me?

**Rebecca and Gwen are in Rebeccas room**  
Gwen: Yo Beckilicious, I have somthin to tell yall  
Rebecca: What is it Gwen?  
Gwen: Homie I's the one who killed JT yo,, I poured poision in his drink when Yalls wasent looking oh and Album drops December 15 yalls, Buy it  
Rebecca: JT Didn't die by getting poisioned.. He got shot  
Gwen: Foo I know I did it I used the some poision you used to frame Liz homie  
Rebecca: Oh well umm The cops think he was shot to death lets leave it at that

**Theresa is in her office with Jared**  
Jared: Tess I think it's time  
Theresa: Excuse me?  
_Jared gets on one knee_  
Theresa: ... Jared, it's been two months.  
Jared: Will you do me and honor and be my wife?  
Theresa: Iiiiiiiiiiiiiii  
_Sam barges into the room_  
Sam: Put your hands up  
_Dramatic Music_

**Next Time on Passionate Baby**  
Kay and Fancy get in a fight  
Mini Whitney comes alive  
Sam arrests Theresa  
What do Jessica and Miguel say to JER?


	7. Chapter 7

**Fancys birthday Party, The Crane mansion Living room**  
_Kay grabs Esme by the hair_  
Kay: Get off of my boyfriend You nasty sut  
_Fancys pulls Esme away from Kay and puts her finger in Kays face_  
Fancy: Don't you ever talk to my friend like that again  
Esme: Yeah don't ever talk like that to me like that again  
_Kay walks near Esme_  
_Esme hids behind Fancy_  
Fancy: Get out of my house you ruined my Birthday party, you Birthday party Ruiner  
Kay: I just came to see Fox you whre  
Fancy: Oh I'm the whore? I'm not the one sleeping with a Crane but has feelings for Miguel  
Noah: ... I'm still here you know  
_Kay slaps Fancy_  
_Fox, Esme and Noah Inhale Loudly_  
_Fancys face turns Dark Red and a Vein grows on her forehead_  
_Fancy jumps on Kay and starts Scracthing and beating her_  
Fox: Oh for heaven sakes  
_Fox splits Kay and Fancy up_  
_Kay runs out of the Mansion crying_  
Fox: Omfg Fancy why did you attack Kay like that you btch?  
Noah: That is no way to talk to your sister Fox  
Fox: Would you mind your own bisnuess And why are you sticking up for Fancy and not your sister?  
Esme: Noah still loves Fancy!  
_Esme looks at Noah_  
Esme: Are you going to eat that frosting thats on your chest?  
Noah: I do not Kay just walks in here and acts like she owns the place, Plus shes the reason why Our parents split up and your Sut of a Mom took my Dad  
Fox: I can't believe your taking Fancys side, She attacked Kay  
Noah: Well Kay had it coming  
_Fox goes after Kay_  
Fancy: So Noah Is it true Do you still love me?  
_Paloma walks into the room_

**Whitneys bedroom at Chads stuido**  
Whitney: Chad stays at work late latley, lmao U.R (Unintentional Rap)  
_Whitney looks at that hedious doll Chad gave her_  
Whitney: Oh The doll chad Gave me is so beautiful  
_Whitney goes to the mirror and brushes her hair_  
_Mini Whitney (The doll) eyes turn red_  
Whitney Sings: Theres something about him, the way that he softly speaks my name.  
_Mini Whitney walks up to Whitney with a knife_  
_Whitney looks where the doll was_  
Whitney: Hrmm thats funny  
_Whitney looks behind her_  
Whitney Screams: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

**Theresas office**  
_Sam puts Theresa in handcuffs_  
Sam: Theresa Lpez-Fitzgereled Crane your arrested for the murder of JT Cornell, you have the right to remain slient  
Jared: Sam Don't arrest Theresa  
Sam: Why not? She is a murderer.. Or should i say murderstress  
Jared: Because she didn't so it  
Sam: Then who did?  
Jared: I did

**The Bennett house**  
JER: So will you guys? Will you guys start a 3sum with me?  
Jessica: For a price maybe  
Miguel: Jessica please... and JER thats disgusting..  
JER: Well I never  
Jessica: Yeah ew Thats disgusting  
_Jessica winks at JER_  
JER: Will I am offended No one was ever spoken to me like that. You guys are crazy, you are going to miss out on this lovin. And for your information I am well rounded for a good time. I like to get spanked But I espically like to be the spanker. I am large and in Charge.  
_JER Leaves the Bennett house pssed_  
Jessica: Oh wow Hes crazy  
Miguel: Umm Yeah he like soo is  
_Jessica and Miguel start making out_

**On the Next Passionate Baby**  
Paloma and Noah admit theyre going out  
Fox over hears Kay admit her true feelings for Miguel  
Mini Whitney stabs Whitney  
Jared calls Theresa from Jail


	8. Chapter 8

**Fancys Birthday Party: Crane Mansion**  
Fancy: So Noah do you still love me?  
_Paloma walks in the living room_  
Noah: Do I still love you Fancy? Ummm  
Paloma: WTF Me and Noah are going out now you STD factory beyotch  
Esme: Oh no She di'int  
Fancy: What?!?! YOU? The little police officer wanna be girl who blames all her problems on Pilar? WTF  
Paloma: I Can explain  
Fancy: Oh I don't wanna hear it  
Paloma: I was the prize for Passions Idol  
Fancy: OMG! I loooved that show!  
Paloma: I KNOW! It was soo good  
Fancy: Yeah who ever created it must've been like a genius  
Paloma: ITA!  
Fancy: Who did you want win?!!?  
Paloma: I was a Kay-mate  
Fancy: EWW! Luis shouldve won!  
Esme: Oh Hel no! Luis was the Omarosa of Passions Idol  
Paloma: LMAO Omarosa! I remember her!!!  
Fancy: Wasnt she that psycho path on the apprentice?  
Paloma: ROTFLMAO! YEAH!  
Fancy: EWWWW I HATED HER!!  
Esme: LMAO ME TOO!!!  
Paloma: ROTFLMAO!

**The Bennett house**  
_Kays goes crying at the front door_  
Kay: Oh I cant believe Fox is having an affair with Esme  
_JER storms out of the Bennett house_  
Kay: Santa?  
_JER gives Kay the finger_  
_Kay looks through the window Where Miguel and Jessica are kissing_  
Kay: Ohh Miguel My heart belongs to you.. But my selfish money loving ways belong to Fox  
Fox: WTF YOU NASTY BEYOTCH  
_Miguel and Jessica walk out of the house_  
Miguel: What is all this comotion?  
Jessica: Did JER fall on his back and can't get up or something?  
Fox: NO! Kay just said She loves you! and shes only using me for my money  
Miguel: Im blushing, But Kay you had your chance to ride the M-L-F Train  
Kay: MLF? Wtf do you mean M.I.L.F?  
Jessica: LMAO  
Fox: I think it stands for Mexicans Losing to Fences  
Kay: LOL  
Miguel: It stands for Miguel Lopez-Fitzgereld idiots  
_Jessica Screams and falls down_  
Miguel: OMG! Jessica!?!?  
Kay: OMG This little ball hit her in the head!  
_Miguel picks up the little ball_  
Fox: WTF is that ball lightning?  
Kay: ...  
Miguel: Omg it opens!!! and theres a paper inside OO  
_Miguel reads the paper_  
Miguel: OMFG It cant be

**Chads studio**  
Whitney: AHHHHH!  
Mini-Whitney: EAT LEAD BTCH!  
_Mini-Whitney stabs Whitney with a pencil_  
Whitney: AHHH! and you know they usually say eat led when you get shot not stabbed with pencils  
Mini-Whitney: My bad  
_Whitney pulls the pencil from out of her new implant_  
Whitney: OMG Chad paid $5000 for that btch!  
_JER peaks in the window on the door_  
JER: Takes a bite off of his KFC Yummy Hot ladies fighting for my love (JER is delusional)  
_Whitney kicks Mini-Whitney, Mini-Whitney goes flying_  
_JER hides because he sees Whitney coming_  
_Whitney runs to the door and tries to open it_  
Whitney: OMG! Its locked omg I'm stuck omg omg omg  
_Whitney runs to the closest window in Chads bedroom_  
JER: WTF I cant see anymore  
_JER takes out his Key for Chads door_  
JER: Lucky I carry this around with me everywhere  
_Whitney tries to open the window_  
Whitney: Why wont this open?!?!  
_Mini-Whitney bites Whitneys leg_  
_Whitney Falls down_  
Whitney: WTF! Do I need a rabbies shot now?!?  
_Mini-Whitney climbs on Whitneys uneven chest_  
Mini-Whitney: Hastalavessta baby  
_Mini Whitneys head spins around 360 degrees_  
_Connie watches from her hidden Cameras_  
_Connie Imagines_: Its time! Mini-Whitney is gonna explode!

**Jared in his Jail**  
Sam: Ok Jared you get to make one Phone call, Whos it gonna be?  
Jared: I'm gonna call Theresa  
Sam: Please pick someone who wont bail you out  
Jared: This is my decision Samantha  
_Jared calls Theresa_  
Jared: Theresa I took the fall for you so Crane wont get bad publicity now can you bail me out?  
Theresa: Sorry Jared G2G bye Dont accuse me of this sht again  
Jared: WTF  
_Theresa hangs up the phone_  
Theresa: Oh Jared Bailing you out would also give Crane bad publicity sorry Hope this is the end of you  
_Theresa gets on her laptop_  
Theresa: I'm going to leak Gwens new single on the internet and hopefully not as many people buy her album! Theresa laughs  
Theresa: Now How do I leak songs... :S

**Tabithas living room**  
Tabitha: Oh this is such a perfect Halloween night Endora just me and you alone No ones here so Sutty mermaids No Spoiled Crane I wish he had this alone time for another month  
Endoras Magic Bubble: Done!  
_Endora freezes everyone in Harmony for One month and 7 days_

**On The next Passionate Baby**  
Luis arrests Sheridan!  
Gwen finds out someone is trying to sabotage her  
Mini-Whitney and Whitney keep fighting  
Find out who was the one behind Jessicas underly planned attempted murder


	9. Chapter 9

**The Crane Cottage**  
Luis: Sheridan You have the right to remain silent anything you can will be used against you  
Sheridan: Oh Luis You're making a big mistake  
Luis: That's going to be used against you.  
Sheridan: Is it?  
Luis: Yes.  
Sheridan: Am I going to get discipline?  
Luis: If you're naughty  
_Luis puts Sheridan in Furry hand cuffs_  
Sheridan: Oh Luis you want sum of this? come and get it  
_Sheridan Runs into her room_  
_Luis Follows_  
_James walks out from hiding with his eyes wide open_  
_Chris walks in, "Honey I'm home"_  
James: Daddy Luis is gonna kick Sheridans fat sorry ass  
Chris: Don't ever talk about your mother like that again James  
James: My Mom's name is Maureen, and its her fault, btch won't make up her mind  
Chris: Oh My God James sence when did you start talking? Werent you like two a week ago  
_James panics_  
James: Luis and Sheridan are in the bedroom

**Gwen at the Recording Studio**  
Gwen: Yo Check dis I hear some Sunny-shine e-Gay leaked my song on some message board Yo  
_Gwen takes a puff_  
Snoop: Oh he No  
_Gwen passes the joint to Puffy_  
Puffy: Yo dis is the stuff Ive been talking about, You put ur Gaurd down and The Biznatches come runnin  
_Puffy takes a puff_  
Snoop: Yo I'lls Tell you what Foshizzle U need to do a publicity stunt, Dog  
_Puffy passes the joint to Snoop_  
Gwen: So My Homies saying I need to like french Madonna or somethin?  
Puffy: Oh No G-Booty, U need to do something more original foo  
_Gwen Imagines_: I've got it I'm going to adopt a kid from Africa

**Chads Studio where Whitney and Mini-Whitney are fighting**  
Mini-Whitney: Self destruct in Five.  
Whitney: Omg omg omg  
_Whitney throws Mini-Whitney_  
_JER sees something flying_  
_Mini-Whitney gets up and starts chasing Whitney_  
Mini-Whitney: Four.  
JER: Four? Is that how many times we're gonna make love?  
Whitney: Oh My God! Who the F is that Fat Man!.. Awwe Did Chad hire a personal Santa for me?  
_JER rolls his eyes_  
JER: Btch Please  
_JER looks in the fridge_  
Mini-Whitney: Three.  
_JER Walks in the living room while eating Ice Cream_  
JER: Personaly I love chocolate ice cream but I am a sucker for butterscotch  
Mini-Whitney: Two.  
Whitney: OMG THAT DOLL IS GONNA EXPLODE  
JER: WTF  
_Whitney pushes JER and she/he falls_  
_JER gets up and starts running for the front door_  
_Mini-Whtiney chases Whitney to the door_  
_JER Slips on the pencil Whitney was stabbed with_  
Mini-Whitney: Ooooonnnnn  
_Mini-Whitney looks up and sees JER's fat ass going straight for her face_  
_JER is now sitting on Mini-Whitney_  
Mini-Whitney: nnneeee.  
_Mini-Whitney explodes under JER_  
JER: Excuse me.

_Connie is spying on this from her apartment_  
Connie: NOOO! MY FCKN PLAN FAILED AHH! I'M GONNA HAVE TO KILL WHITNEY MY SELF :  
_Chad walks in Connies room_  
Chad: WTF!

**The Bennets Front Yard**  
Kay: So Miguel, Whats the little note say  
Miguel: It says,,  
_Miguel covers his mouth_  
Miguel: It says...  
Miguel: Oh God..  
_Fox grabs the note from Miguel_  
Fox: It says "Signn was here"  
Miguel: Oh Lord  
Kay: Umm Whos "Signn" Omg Is this about that movie with the Aliens  
Miguel: Signn is a lady that I found on myspace  
Kay: Myspace is for little 12 year old wannabe emo girls  
Miguel: Thats why I like it  
Fox: Tell us more about this sign  
Miguel: Well I posted a photo of my self on my profile and she said that she's going to murder anyone that tries to get with me  
Kay: Well I Guess that explains Jessica  
_Camera shows Jessica laying on the ground with flies flying around her_  
Fox: What else did she say? Why did you give her your address?  
Miguel: I didn't give her my Address She tracked my I.P  
Kay: How did she get your I.P?  
Miguel: I don't know.. I think she called myspace or something  
_Fox, Kay and Miguel hear something in the bushes_  
Miguel: Thats Her!  
_Miguel Fox and Kay chase her_

Signn: Holy sht

**Next Time On Passionate Baby**  
Chris and Luis get in a fight  
Gwen calls Africa to reserve a Child  
Chad questions Connie's Athoraton  
Miguel Fox and Kay Chase Signn


	10. Chapter 10

**The Crane Cottage**  
Chris: What? Luis and Sheridan are in the bedroom?  
James: Yes they were hand cuffing each other and they threw the hand cuffs and hit me on the head then i seen lights  
Chris: That son of a btch, no offence James  
_Chris goes in Sheridans bedroom_  
_Luis is dressed as a gimp crawling on the floor barking_  
Chris: WTF  
Luis: OMg Chris its not what it looks like  
_Sheridan walks in from the closet holding a whip_  
Sheridan: OMG Chris  
Chris: Sheridan how could you! and Luis you want a peice of this?  
_Chris grabs Luis by the hair_  
Luis: Ow ow ow let go let go I'm serious  
_Luis grabs Chris's hair_  
Chris: LET GO LUIS  
Luis: You let go first  
Chris: No you ow ow  
Sheridan: OMG They are killing each other  
_Sheridan calls 911_  
_Luis's cell phone rings_  
Sheridan: Dmn I forgot  
_Sheridan sees a ghostly figure in the mirror_  
Sheridan: AHHHH!

**Gwens recording Studio**  
_Gwen picks up the phone_  
Gwen: Yo I wud like to get the number for Africa  
Lady on Phone: Umm Where exacley  
Gwen: Dunno.. The bthces who sell the kids  
Lady on Phone: Oh your looking for Slave kids 4 U  
Gwen: No I want to adopt a child like Angelina Jolie homie  
Lady on Phone: Oh Ok in a minute  
_Lady on phone redirects Gwens call to world Vision_  
World Vision: Hi This is world vision If the child you've ordered has aids or leporsy press 1, If you would like to return a child because he or she has hunted your pet and killed it press 2, If your child refuses to dig for diamonds for you press 3, If you would like to talk to the staff press 4  
_Gwen presses 4_  
World Vision Operator: World Vision  
Gwen: Yo I'd like to adopt a kid  
World Vision Operatror: Ok we're running slow, next shipment is Friday  
Gwen: Dang foo Can I reserve one?  
World Vision Operator: Sure thing and just to let you know we're having a sale, Buy 2 get one half off  
Gwen: I'll take one biz  
World Vision Operator: _Typing_  
World Vision Operator: Actually you're in luck We have one Child in stock  
Gwen: Aiites I'll take it  
World Vision Operator: Ok, His name is Todd  
Gwen: Sold  
World Vision Operator: Now are you going to pick him up your self? If not Fedex will charge your half price if you decide in 10 seconds  
_Jepordy Music Goes on in the Background_  
Gwen: Aiites I'll use Fedex  
World Vision Operator: Your child will show up at your door by 10am tommorow morning  
Gwen: Aiites Bye homie

**Connies Apartment**  
Chad: WTF Did you just say you're going to kill Whitney?  
Connie: No  
Chad: Oh ok My bad  
Connie: I said I wanna chill with Britney  
Chad: Ya so do I.. Ur lucky your nice n small and we all know how she dosent wear underwear  
Connie: Eww sicko I'm not Timmy you know

**The Bennett Front Yard**  
_Signn runs away_  
_Miguel Fox and Kay chase her_  
_Signn grabes a pole and uses it to get across the fence_  
Kay: Like zomg How are we going to get across  
Fox: Miguel will teach us hes good at this kind of stuff  
Miguel: WTF  
_Fox immatates Mexican hat dance music_  
Miguel: You guys are so Mean I'm going home  
Kay: Now look what you did and How are we going to across Fox?  
Fox: I dont know let me get on your shoulders  
Kay: What? No You give me a Boost  
Fox: But Kaaaaay your shoes are all muddy  
Kay: Well I'm not letting you get on my shoulders  
Fox: Kay you are such a bad girlfriend

_Fancy is walking her dog Pricella_  
Fancy: Oh its such a beautiful day I just hope I don't get raped  
_Signn runs and steps on Pricellas tail_  
Fancy: OMG Pricella!  
Fancy: Watch where your going next time you cruel lady  
_Signn kicks Pricella in the stomach and Pricella goes flying in the Lake_  
Fancy: OMG  
Fancy: Why did I ever come to Harmony? I've been nothing but miserable sence I came  
Signn: Btch btch btch  
Fancy: I feel like packing my bags getting Theresa Whitney and Kay leaving town or something  
Signn: This isnt Four Queens: A Winning Hand idiot  
Fancy: I Know the Four Queens fan base is Based on Friendship of the writer thats why it became so popular While Passionate Baby was an Idependent fanfic  
Signn: ITA!


	11. Chapter 11

**The Crane Cottage**  
Sheridan: AHHHH A GHOST!  
_Sheridan gets a vacuum: die btch_  
Ghost: Turn that thing on and I'll pop a cap in yo $$  
Sheridan: Who are you?  
Ghost: My name is Maureen  
Sheridan: Come again.. That name sounds firmiliar  
Maureen: Well I am James' real Mom I died in the Tsunami  
_Sheridan hits her self in the head_  
Sheridan: OMG Good to see you You look different with dry hair  
Maureen: LOL oh you  
Sheridan: JK Anyway what are you doing here?  
Maureen: I wanted to tell you that Chris ins't James' real Father  
Sheridan: WTF  
Maureen: Truth is I was knocked up at a bar restroom even Forget the guys name  
Sheridan: So your saying Chris was lying to me?  
Maureen: Percicly

_Luis and Chris let go of each others hair_  
Luis: Uhh is Sheridan talking to her self again  
Chris: looks like it

_Maureen pulls out a Machiene gun_  
Chris: OMG WTF  
_Maureen shoots Chris 106 times in the head_  
Luis: Justice!

**The Crane mansion front yard**  
Esme: Oh this snow is so lovely It reminds me of all the cocaine I've snorted  
_Fox walks outside_  
Esme: Hi hot stuff  
Fox: Umm what are you doing outside of my familys house?  
Esme: It dosent matter It's 11pm Shouldnt you be with Kay over Tabithas?  
Fox: Yes I came to borrow ciggarette money from Theresa  
Esme: Oh...  
Esme: Anyway.. while we're alone  
Esme: No I meant some weird light.. It dosent matter  
Esme: ok  
Fox: Yeah umm I'm going to go so umm yeah  
Esme: See you soon  
_Fox's cellphone falls out of his pocket_  
Esme: Hrmmm SHould I tell him or not... I dont think so

**The Bennet house, Jessicas bedroom**  
Jessica: Ummmm Spike I have to tell you something  
Spike: What is it my Wife  
Jessica: I Want a divorce  
Spike: WHAT! why?  
Jessica: Well I am into Miguel now.. And I hate how you take like 2 hours curling your hair every morning  
Spike: WTF These are natural curls Btch  
Jessica: Oh Please We all know you arent natrually curly.. Well except for down thurr  
Spike: I am shocked and offended! You want a divorce you got it!

_Spike gets up and grabs his suitcase_  
_Spike packs his clothes, happy face stickers, hair spray and curling iron_  
Spike: See you Jessica, See you in h3ll  
_Spike slams the door_

_Spike walks out of the Bennett house and walks to the B&B_  
_Spike sees a bright light in a feild_  
Spike: WTF  
_Spike sees the bright light hovering in the middle of the feild_  
_Spike walks to in the center of the feild_  
Spike: Ok...  
_The mysterious air craft lands_  
_The air craft door opens and 3 mysterious figures walk out_  
Spike: WTF  
Aliens: We come in peace


	12. Chapter 12

**The Bennett House, Kitchen**  
_Jessica calls Miguel on the phone_  
Miguel: Hello  
Jessica: Hello Miguel, Have you heard?  
Miguel: Yeah! Rosie is picking on Paula Abdul now.. what a btch!  
Jessica: ... I Didn't mean that  
Miguel: O rly?  
Jessica: Yes Spike was kidnapped by Aliens! Were free to be together!  
Miguel: OMG Thats soo weird! I mean like.. why him?  
Jessica: Yeah I know .. anyway I called you because I wanted to ask you to come over  
Miguel: Sorry.. I'm broke  
Jessica: ...  
Miguel: JK LOL I'll be there in a sec  
Jessica: Ok Bye

_In The Living room_  
Sam: Why is Miguel all over my daughters?  
Noah: Relax Dad Miguel is better then Spike  
Sam: Yeah I guess.. anyways They don't look like herpies just go wash it off and see what happens  
_Jessica walks in_  
Noah: I tried that..  
Jessica: What are we talking about now?  
Sam: Noah thinks he has herpies  
Jessica: Oh Let me see I should know  
_Noah shows Jessica_  
Jessica: Oh Thats from scratching too hard  
Noah: Oh false alarm I guess  
Jessica: Yeah

_Doorbell rings_  
Jessica: That must be Miguel  
_Jessica walks to the front door_  
Jessica: In a minute  
_Jessica Opens the door_  
Charity: Hey Jessica! I'm back  
_Charity hugs Jessica_  
_Jessica has a surprised/insulted look on her face_

**Tabithas, Living room**  
Tabitha: I have to get out of this town! First hell in a closet now Aliens?  
Fox: Yeah thats retarded.. How did the Aliens get to Kay when she was suppose to be in bed?

_Tabitha Flases back looking in her Magic Bowl earlier_  
_Kay Calls Fox's Cellphone_  
Kay: Hey Fox its 11:30 where are you?  
Esme: I'm sorry Fox is busy right now  
Kay: WTF ESME? WTF IM GOING THERE RIGHT NOW!  
/Flash Back Over

Tabtiha: Thats what I'm wondering It's as if she left In the middle of the night or something  
Fox: First I lose my cell phone then Kay... I don't think it's gonna get any worse  
_Miguel puts on his coat_  
Fox: Miguel if your going to try to look for Kay I already tried and failed  
_Camera shows a trampoline outside with a telescope in the center_  
Miguel: I'm not I'm going over Jessicas  
Fox: Oh Ok Whatever.. I'm going in the kitchen to get something to drink  
_Miguel walks out of the house_  
Endora: Mom what are they still doing here.. I mean Kay's in Outer Space now..  
Tabitha: Mommy needs something to look at my dear  
_Fox walks back in the living room_  
Tabitha: Fox while your up can you get the tv remote I dropped over there  
Fox: Sure thing  
_Fox bends down and picks it up_  
_Tabitha tilits her head looking at Fox's ass_  
Tabitha: mmmmmmmmmm  
_Tabitha's hand reaches_  
_Fox stands up and turns around_  
Fox: Here you go Tabby  
Tabitha: ... oh Fox your welcome

**Crane Mansion Entrence**  
_Pretty pulls up in her new 2007 Mercedes-Benz SLR 722 _  
_Fancy runs out of the Crane mansion_  
Fancy: Oh My God Pretty I havent seen you in years!  
_Pretty gets out of her Car_  
Pretty: OMG Fancy!  
_Pretty and Fancy Hug_  
Fancy: How have you been?  
Pretty: I'm doing very well thank you I have a new boyfriend his name is Dylan!  
Fancy: Thats sweet I'm not seeing anyone at the moment  
Pretty: Oh.. Like my new bag? Its by Louis Vuitton!  
Fancy: ...  
Pretty: Do you like my new car?  
Fancy: Yes! The work you've done is amazing!  
Pretty: What?..  
_Pretty looks down_  
_Pretty puts her hands over her chest_  
Pretty: Giggles Oh Fancy!  
Fancy: Ugh I was talking about the car..  
Pretty: Oh LOL!  
Fancy: So wheres Dylan  
Pretty: Oh He's at our Room in Vegas..  
Fancy: .. By him self...?  
Pretty: Oops! I mustve left him my bad!  
Fancy: Pretty you are so selfish do you care about anything other then your self?!  
Pretty: Whats with the additude? What did I do now?  
_Fancy rolls her eyes_  
Fancy: Do you even care that out half brother Little Ethan was kidnapped by Aliens!


End file.
